Its almost been a year since I've started treating myself as a human, I mean its not like I used to worship myself before, its just that i have started giving myself a room for failure.
The way I see it, failure is what makes us human, if all of my decisions were correct all the time, and everything i ever did turned out great then what would be the difference between me and god, right?
Not everything i do has to be about perfection, some things can simply be about trying, i think we, as humans have created this unrealistic level of judgement that we need to be good at everything we do, and it is not true, you can be totally shit at your hobbies, and it wont matter, no great cricketer laughs at someone who doesn't know how to hold a bat,
I, for sure know Dostoevsky wouldn't laugh at my writings, or Gulzar would laugh at my poems, you know what I think, they would pat my back, appreciate my efforts and tell me to keep going because i could be great at it one day.
Mind you, i used the word "could", because again, you don't necessarily have to be good it.
Embarrassment is an unexplored emotion, why the fear of being cringe? why do you care what they think? more importantly, who are they? your friends? they already know who you are, they signed up for this when they made you a friend, then what? your family? they knew you before your friends did, so who's left? a bunch of people who you've never met before and have no intention to do so?
Are non of you aware how easy it is to delete a comment on social media? or to report a profile? or to even hire a hitman to take someone out for you? (not in a romantic way ofc) life is full of hacks if you look for them, and it is easy to do so because no one would even look for them because they're hideous in real life too.
I started learning how to ride a bike a month back, and from then i've been trying to do it consistently, since last week, i have improved a lot and you can say that i'm somewhat good at it, but if u saw me on day 1, you would see a medieval child crying for his mom while being stuck in modern day traffic,
Some days it was so bad, i actually thought about going eco-friendly on cycle, even walking seemed like a good option, but one thing i knew was that no matter what, i get over this and learn how to ride a bike, its just i have to cry about it first!
What i feel like is that these blogs have nothing to do with you, i just write these in retrospect so that i could justify what i did in the past in a more, how can i say this, umm, in a more profound and stoic manner, i imagine myself sitting under a tree teaching my disciples on how to figure out life but honestly, each of my reader is older than but while on the other hand, 100% in need of these words, because your brain is not braining and u need someone (me) to guide u through life.
Even as human I'm above u hehe, I'm more like a pure brahman in Hindu tree while you're the muggle blood from harry potter. Bye!
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